I can't stand it anymore

I can't stand it anymore.
He laughs in front of his laptop all by himself.
He screams suddenly in front of his laptop.
He smiles blankly looking at the chemistry book.
He giggles and speaks to himself in the bath room.
He has all the characteristics of a unhygienic person.
He has the tidiest arrangements of his belongings.
I can't bear it anymore.
But what can I do?
He is too old to be given advice.
I can't stand it anymore.

Have you ever?

Have you ever felt like a zombie?
Where you do not know what you want exactly.
Where you will grab anything when you are walking in a hypermarket and pay it at the counter.
Where you eat but do not know what is the taste of the food like.
Where you have no expression when you are watching something funny.
Where you are merely faking yourself in front of your friends.
Where you just nod your head when your friends are talking to you.
Have you?

The importance of the first step

When I was walking back from the stadium just now, I realized that I was stepping on the tiles that have similar pattern. If I wanted to step on the tiles that are of different patterns, I needed to make my widen my pace or make it narrower. Hence, there are two things that come into my mind.
The first thing is that we must be very careful in making our first step. We must make sure that our initiation is a correct one. Once that is determined, our route would be easy. On the other hand, if we had made a wrong choice at the beginning, it would be difficult for us to get back on track, though it's possible.
The second thing is that we must be alert with our progress. When I was walking just now, I got distracted with the tiles of different patterns. Therefore, I stepped on the different tiles. Analogically, when we are doing something, we will get distracted sometimes. Hence, we must be aware of our own pace and concentrate on what we are doing. As a result, we will get a fruitful ending or outcome.

Expectations

It's been a while since I last updated my blog. It would be good if I could update it everyday. Well, I will try to.
What is my topic for today? Let's talk about expectations. You know what, I have this kind of good and obedient image in my family. I am perceived as good and obedient by my family members, be it close ones or the extended ones. Since I have this kind of image, there are lots of things that I should not be doing. People will start questioning me if I didn't get a good result in a examination. People will start saying "What is wrong with you?" if I got my ear pierced.
Having this kind of 'good-boy' image has its pros and cons. Let's talk about the pros first. First of all, you will get people to love you and care about you. You will be like a treasure at home instead of a burden. People will give you food and money frequently. Then, people will feel proud of you. They will complement you in the public. And, of course, you yourself will feel good about it. And this will boost up your self-confidence, self-efficacy and all the self's.
On the other hand, when you are a good fellow, you should not even think of doing certain things which go against the norms. Of course, we should not be doing such things. But, you know, as a teenager and a young adult, there are many distractions out there. And teenagers and young adults are curious and have been always wanting to try new things. However, you should not be doing things that are perceived bad because you would like to maintain the good image of yours.
So, this is one of the major sacrifices that you have to make.
Alright, that is it for today. Let's continue in the following entry. Thanks for reading.

Distractions

How would you perceive distractions?
Distractions really denote negative associations to me. When I have set my goal, of course, I would like to achieve my goal. However, these distractions, which come in many forms, would try their best to fail my effort to accomplish something. Gosh! How could I eliminate all these distractions?
After analyzing the distractions, I realize that they come in two primary forms. One of those is material distraction. This distraction, I believe, is the one that bothers the majority. Human beings like to enjoy and indulge ourselves in the things that make us feel good. Ultimately, this will make our wallet gets thinner and the amount in our account gets lesser.
Then, food can be our distraction as well. What is the primary function of food? I believe, food gives us energy and necessary vitamin and minerals. However, food, if taken excessively, would make us turn out to be something else. Obesity is one of the consequence.
How can I remove these two distractions so that I can achieve my goal? Only He knows.

My Salad Days

When I was taking my bath just now, I reflected how I am blessed with such a wonderful family. Unlike my elder brother and sister, I did not have to do household chores at all. I did not have to help my parents for the pepper field. Though I was still young at that point of time (when my family was managing pepper and cocoa farm), I would have to work at the farm if my parents insisted to (like any other parents in the same setting).
My parents tell me that the only thing that I should do is to study. I feel so sorry for them that they need to pay extra attention on me due to my weak physic when I was a child. They needed to sent me over to Sibu Hospital every week to get my cough healed. According to the doctor, I might get asthma if the coughing was not cured. Therefore, my father needed to apply leave every Tuesday, if I was not mistaken, just to send me to the hospital.
And, I was scared to go to school. Whenever I was sent to school, I would scream and cry and crawl as a sign of protest. I just did not know why I behaved like that. My family must feel ashamed for that. But, I did not get lesser love and care from them, despite my weird and annoying behaviour.
Later when I was at the secondary school, I was poor in certain subjects such as Mathematics. I felt bad about it. I wrote to my sister who was studying at UPM at that time. I told her that I felt intimidated that I did not get good results for my Mathematics. Upon receiving the letter, she arranged one of her friends who was teaching in Sarikei to give me tuition. She settled the tuition fees for me too. I was touched. I appreciated it and I felt like I owed her. I am really glad that I have such a considerate and lovable sister.
I would like to give credit for each one of my family members. You make my life complete and you are the only thing that is worth embracing, if I were to choose one only. Thank you, my family.

A bit of reflection after 8 weeks of teaching practice

We met as strangers.
You know my name but I didn't know yours.
As time went by,
we get to know each other better before we say goodbye.
You may appear mischievous,
but I know you just want to be marvelous.
You nodded when I taught,
I nodded too when you uttered your thought.
You reminded me to my schooling days,
which had passed like rays.
I taught you through my experience,
hope that would make sense.
I wish you all the best,
be the best,
because we are the best.
(I would like to acknowledge the principal of SMTKJ as for the last 3 line.)